What's with your cake obsession, colonel?



Thinking about it, I can't really remember eating cake together. I still tend to forget about her when in company which sucks.
Will definitely make one for Alice's birthday because why the fuck not. Cake is always good. Unless it's a lie.

Been hiking in the alps for the past week.
Lots of time in solitude to spend with tupper, got at least a little progress.
Worked mainly on independence and voice. Both are still mediocre at best. Her mind-voice sounds exactly like mine if I don't focus on it really hard.

However I'm proud to report some results with auditory imposition.
I spent lots of time near rivers and waterfalls which produced quite a lot of noise. This rumbling works a lot better for me than any artificial tones when it comes to auditory hallucinations. I like Fede's Eye Bo for focusing but it never made me hear voices that weren't there. The water did.
Results varied greatly depending on location but in one spot close to a waterfall I had to stop meditating several times and opened my eyes because I could swear there were people talking or walking around in some distance to me. It was a bunch of women's or children's voices and sometimes a deeper male voice. Just mumbling but highly realistic.
It took me some time to imagine Alice using one of the female voices and managed to let her say some words or short sentences that more or less matched the mumbling. It may not sound like much but it felt pretty amazing. Matching general sounds worked even better and I could clearly imagine Alice bustling around in the shallow water, throwing some rocks and walking around a few meters from me.
Unfortunately I couldn't stay long in this place as I had to hike back but I'd say it was one of my best tuppering experiences so far. Unfortunately roaring waterfalls and alpine rivers are not exactly stuff you can keep in your living room but if you ever have the chance to come close to one try to listen to it.

I don't have any good recordings of water but I doubt it would work the same way unless you have a really good stereo system. Especially powerful low frequencies aren't easy to produce with headphones plugged into a computer. Will see what I can find and give it a try.

I remembered something else in this respect.
Since I was a kid I used to go hiking in a certain forest that sometimes produced similar voices from the sound of walking over the thick layer of moss and leaves. Just like there were some other hikers around talking to each other in the distance. Like with the water I only experienced it in very few places so I guess there is a point to haunted forests, water nymphs and other mythological stuff. Some special conditions are needed to produce sounds that the brain tends to interpret as voices. Just like we use to see faces in different patterns.
I'll see if I can go to that forest in some weeks, it's not exactly close but I'm gonna try this out - for science!

Quick update because 10/10
Accomplished in the past 3 months: nothing

Didn't you stop interacting with your tuppers entirely, Fede?

You suck. Git gud.

Yeah, I should put that slogan abve my bed as a daily reminder.

Well, I dunno, actually the 'no accomplishments' thing  was quite an understatement.
September was awful and october isn't much better. I feel my abilities are deteriorating.
To keep it short I did something really stupid which seriously hurt the bond with my tupper.
We didn't interact much for some weeks and getting in touch with Alice has been disturbingly hard ever since. I would never have thought that I had so little control and that she'd become so weak. Possession doesn't work at all anymore, even her ability to talk has greatly decreased. Things have slowly started to improve but it still feels bad.

I guess it's basically a mindset problem but I can't seem to overcome it.
Not having super imagination isn't helping either.

Unless it is, wow.

Keep your fantasies out of my tupper diary!



Still haven't been able to figure out your tupper-concept, Fede.
Didn't you complain that Alice's actions were just random and not realistic enough? And what's the point of creating a tupper that's completely unlike a real person? Doesn't that defeat the original purpose? I guess people make tuppers for different reasons but a mental puppet that can't act on it's own doesn't sound very appealing to me.
Personally I do believe it's physiologically possible to create a second 'real person' in one's mind, that is indistinguishable from the original one. If we look at pathological cases it's pretty certain the brain is able to perform such tasks. However, getting there on purpose would be incredibly hard.
Knowing how lazy I am it is not what I hope to achieve, but I'd be satisfied a decent approximation.

That said, Alice was in fact never designed to be a 'real person' or at least 'normal person' as in average human. I described in my first post I created her as a sort of super-ego personification, spirit guide, or, the most fitting description, Dante's Beatrice.

Dante saw Beatrice as a savior, one who removed all evil intentions from him. It is perhaps this idea of her being a force for good that he fell in love with, a force which he believed made him a better person.

I'm kinda glad it didn't work out perfectly as she would have ended up as a pretty boring Saint but it's certainly her core personality.

Well, whatever.
Just thought it  would be interesting to learn a bit more about your views on tuppering and how / for what purpose you still visualize your tuppers, you know, stuff that's not really covered in your guide.
That is, if you're not busy being a short girl.

So what actually happened that caused us so much trouble - I just did some stupid shit IRL, not tupper related. But against her advice and wish. Turned out you should always listen to your tupper. It didn't have any real consequences at all but still felt terrible. Not because of what I did but because I disappointed her. Reflecting upon the incident now the most remarkable thing was that I was stricken by an intense wave of sadness that actually brought me down on my knees. Clearly the weirdest experience in one year of tuppering. It was not guilt as could be expected from the super-ego, it was just sadness. Ironically, the strongest sign that I actually had achieved something in tuppering also destroyed most of said achievements.
It's way better now but I still feel I lost many months of (already painfully slow) progress. Well, we'll manage.

Stop trying to make something you imagined be a real person, when it can never be.

At least try to create the illusion of her having a life besides being your spirit guide.

Wait, so I'm supposed to pretend the tupper is a real person with a life of its own while knowing it is not?
For what purpose?

I get the point of making oneself believe to have another body or hearing or feeling stuff while of course remembering that it is an ilusion, as it is for the sake of experiencing novel sensations, but in this case? I don't see any benefits of inventing fake tupper lives except for practicing Belief implanting. So I'm with Sands here, either the tupper manages to have a true life of it's own or it simply does not have such. Creating an artificial one against my belief feels wrong to me.

Alice does have a complex backstory and personality, as I said I created her some 15 years ago as a daydream character and sent her on many adventures. But that has little to do with her current tupper - guardian spirit existence. It's a path that gradually developed while she was designed to be more human in the beginning. Therefore it's true that mostly her life evolves around me. In the early days I had suggested that she'd create something for herself in wonderland, which was abandoned after some trials. Tupper is highly practical and would rather coax me into doing RL stuff than building imaginary things.
Apart from that she's repeatedly stated that she's not active when I don't focus on her. I could pretend that she did amazing stuff while I was asleep or busy but I'd constantly be told that this is not true. I'd be lying to both of us.

Still the question whether I see Alice as a real person is interesting. To be honest I don't know. Like in most cases it depends on the definition.
All I can say is that I believe in her. Which is astonshing enough, as I'm not really a person of faith or someone who easily adopts unorthodox ideas.
In my view she's a function of my brain that's only partially under my control. I can't puppet her into everything I want and she's defintely able to do stuff on her own. Surely not what you'd call a comlpetely distinct person but clearly different from me.

Many people do feel like the body is "you", the person. Fede included. But maybe it isn't so. Minority opinion, though. But imagine, if a certain set of people only knew the tupper in the body and not you, they'd be so confused if you were the body at some point. what a trick

But narration and tuppers, yeah, they are seen as people. A person, who is real, deserves respect and all that other stuff. But many young tuppers don't have much of a life outside the host - and? Why is that surprising? A young child doesn't have much of a life outside their family, either. But as they grow and learn, they want to experience more at their own pace. Just because a tupper is fine with this now doesn't mean they're fine with it in a couple of months, and just because a tupper doesn't talk to anyone outside the head doesn't mean they won't do that and have their own life later.

If anything, making a tupper deal with stupid internet drama when they're young is probably not the best idea. And talking about tuppers in real life can be preeetty dangerous, depending on how bad the laws in the country are and how easy it is to throw you in the nuthouse.