Dream thread: Record your tulpa related dreams.

[Joy]

[Bear]

I was somehow at the palace of the king or sultan or something it looked fancy and this was before electricity. The headmaiden, or whatever you call someone who handles the women of the harem or slaves, was talking about a girl they've been training but she was too small to accommodate her position in the breeding program. So they were going to kill her.

I had the feeling that I was a well respected artisan or smith. Before I left I said, "let me take her."

They looked at me like I didn't know what I was talking about. "I'll take her and register her as my daughter. I can do that."

The headmaiden said, "One choice that will bring a lifetime of commitment."

I didn't care.

They let me have her, she was basically Summer.

I took her to the registrar and someone right before me was registering his daughter, about the same age. They didn't ask questions just, "okay, here's the paperwork or whatever."

So I took her home and she was quiet for days, I fed her and treated her like a daughter.

Weird.

 

[Alice]

>when you have erotic dreams even in sleep paralysis
Just Bear things

[Joy]

My day job office had a slide in it, like an ultra colorful child slide that was huge and complicated. At the same time there was a party going on and we were firing rockets into the sky in a competition.

A gaggle of HR Karens set up a ultra-colorful plastic automated train for children and suddenly there were a dozen children under 5 running around and ruding it. In the corcer of this rather large room was my desk. I was thinking they were trying to take my office.

The latest rocket had a flat wide nosecone, awful aerodynamics, no wonder it didn't go very high.

Now I was riding the slide down the side of the building but it was blocked at the end and a fat guy who looked like Randy Quaid was looking at me like I did something wrong.



I get off and walk with some familiar people and I was going home, it was night by nowso I get a call, it's the Howard Stern show, Howard wants Tucker Carlson's phone number. I ask them to hold on and I do have it, three numbers:

*979
1-800
And a nromal phone number.

I say goodbuy to Howard and that was it.

[Alice]

I love those insane dreams.
Host had a cool dream but we forgot.

[Bernd]

More D&D nonsense, this time in tabletop game form.:

I was watching the vlog of a grey-mouse girl that lived in an attic apartment with cats. I have never watched a vlog or any influencers in my entire life. Unfortunately I forgot what was going on a the beginning, but she was playing D&D with figurines on a table. There was a close-up of the figurines next to a D6 dice. They were the same size as dice and only consisted of equally cubic heads. The enemies were WH40k - like tin figurines of goblins. All on a white table cloth without further accessories.
The dream warped and now I was sitting in a posh Victorian-era version of my living room. Much larger, dark furniture, lots of house plants like man-sized palm trees. Not too far off from the real deal actually. I was sitting at the same table, but wasn't a player. On the table was a glass vase with 2 plants inside. A Ricinus and a branch of Ficus lyrata.





The grey mouse influencer girl narrates from the off, now oddly in German while everything was English before. And now, things go South...
"The adventurers are facing a giant dick with 1 billion HP"
This is literally what she said. This evil is represented by the Ricinus plant. They must make it onto the Ficus which represents the forces of Good. There is only one player sitting next to me. A young man in his 20s who vaguely looks like one or several random dudes I would see at university while studying. Has a beard, looks leftist. The DM is sitting a bit offside on the stairs leading to the upper floor. Yep, it's my living room. The player points at the Ricinus and asks the DM if he can sniff it. The DM is ok with it. The player rips off one large Ricinus leaf and starts chewing on it. It must taste awful, at least that's what his face says. He keeps talking nonsense and begins tripping hard. I watch with slight amusement how he almost has to puke and ask him if he knows that this is Ricinus and that even the leaves are quite poisonous and severely allergenic. Player says yeah, he knows. I laugh and look at the DM, saying all is going according to his script (Alice's obsession is haunting me even in dreams). Nervous laughter from the DM who now considers whether he should call an ambulance.

That's when I woke up. Very realistic and entertaining, the room was great. But the giant dick with 1 billion HP would not have been necessary...

[Kashtan]

lmao dude wtf are you smoking?

[Joy]

I dreamt there was a new disease everyone was doing stupid unscientific things to avoid. It was called pneumonia but it was more like flesh-eating virus because if you got it, well you basically rotted. So I had this hot Japanese girlfriend influencer and she was constantly streaming. The mandate was to not drive cars that had any sharp corners and to at all cost avoid forks. So my girlfriend was using something like a pate knife to eat noodles but it has a sharp point so basically malicious compliance. I intentionally carried a fork with me wherever I went and my car was also "too pointy" technically.

I accidentally dropped my fork in the way of a all-black funeral procession and retrieved it before they noticed.

This time it seemed no one was buying "the science" even though this disease was way more serious.

So I visited my girlfriend and she was wearing some kind of spiral outfit. She stepped off stream to kiss me and spun in her outfit basically opening to flash me.

Good times, good times. No sex so not a top tier dream but it felt nice.

[Kashtan]

not bad either! i wonder if we can ever explain how the brain comes up with this shit.

i was in charge of building a temporary colosseum for Putin who was something like a roman emperor.



was a modern setting though and the colosseum was like a stage for an event. the base was stone like the colosseum in rome but on top it had a core of gray ABS plastic like the pipes. covered in gray clay and green turf or rolled sod on top. the event was finished and i was in a hurry to disassemble the colosseum again. standing on top high up i personally took off the turf layer and scraped down the thick layer of clay revealing some of the ABS core while lots of construction workers were busy with the stone foundation. after a while Putin called me to his palace and told me he wants to hold another festival. he wore a white roman toga and appeared bored and disinterested. i thought man ive just begun disassembling this shit and asked him how soon he wanted to hold the next festival. i was shown a diagram in a medieval book displaying the circle of the moon from full to half in a 90° angle. new moon and the other half were missing. from this i somehow concluded i had 4 days. at first that seemed plenty but then i did some dream math and figured it would be a close call. i tried to tell Putin id do my best but could not promise the colosseum would be ready by then. i thought im an idiot why did i rush to tear down the construction so quickly to begin with? then i woke up.

fuck man - why would i ever work for Putin of all people?

[Τamamo]

After an eternity I remembered a vivid dream!
I was sitting on a bench in a run-down park in West Asia. Maybe India. More wilderness than an orderly park. Definitely not Singapore.
To my left was a gate, and one by one, dinosaurs of increasing size showed up and were introduced. First they were just skeletons, but moving D&D style. Then they turned into flesh and blood dinosaurs. The first one was an small nimble predator the size of a chicken. An off-voice praised it as a good pest control as it would eat mice and roaches. It turned into flesh and blood, it had a grey hide ad a long tail. It disappeared in the bushes. Larger and larger skeletons appeared ta the gate, all bipedal dinosaurs. But most looked like a bad reconstruction from the early 20th century. There was an Iguanodon which was huge. It was a bit scary sitting next to it, and it made loud generic dinosaur noises once it turned into a live animal before it left.

Next an old oriental man with white hair and a white beard and shabby traditional clothes appeared. He told me he had a T-Rex and I should come check it out. We walked out of the park and into a harbor. Next to the water, cars were parked along the dock. Also shabby. And between the cars indeed was - a T-Rex. Or uh, sort of.
It was flesh and blood but did not move. It fact it was more like another car that had been parked there. And man it was bad. Think of a cheap Chinese plastic toy dinosaur the size of a small truck. It had 4 elephant-like legs, A huge open mouth with white teeth (clearly plastic) and a stupid looking short tail. Colored in an orange-pink camo pattern. Heinous. It was so bad I had to laugh and woke up.

[Bernd]

Very deep and elaborate dream. Skeletons and D&D remain popular topics...

I was on a firearm training course in Eastern Europe, like I had been countless times. As usual, things were a bit chaotic. After arriving at a shooting range, I was stuck in the process of registration. The instructors spoke to me in a slav language I could not understand before switching to English, but it did not make much sense either. Both instructors I met exist irl and they were very recognizable in the dream. There were a lot of people, but all teenage boys. Like a high school class on a field trip. I waited in line before a booth until it was my turn. The instructor handed me a schedule on paper and was told to wait on a chair. Over a speaker, groups were announced and told to gather by a color code. I desperately looked at my schedule plan which had colors all over so I had no idea which group I was assigned to. One by one, the groups of about a dozen people gathered and left. I was still there on my own. Finally the instructor returned, grinned at me and said something like I'm in the girls group. The girls arrived with him - and man, it was a sight to behold!

They didn't have a color code but a banner with a female saint carrying as sword. The girls were an army, completely dressed up in bizarre straw suits covering their entire bodies like a ghillie suit. Somehow like the folkloristic Buttnmandln in South Bavaria who accompany St. Nicholas and the Krampus.


Instead of a devil mask, they wore Greek marble face masks. And a few colorful bands on their otherwise straw covered heads.


Apart from their eerie outfit, these were clearly early teen girls around 14 maybe. Noticeably shorter than me. The girls were serious, disciplined but in a hurry to get going. I was still in that big chair, and they lifted me up and carried me in front of them - on the chair, like a king or ruler. I couldn't really see them as they were behind or under me. Some were complaining why I was in their group, but others replied that Bernd (they knew my name!) would do all the difficult things for them. So here I was in my favorite rule as errand boy / useful idiot for teen girls.


On my chair, unable to face this straw covered girl army, I tried to say something like 'come on, it's not that bad' and reached out to them behind me with my hand. Indeed I got high-fives and the matter was settled. The girls rushed on and carried me into a dark Gothic church. My role was to open a series of huge iron gates one after the other while they pressed on at full speed. Again it was cartoon territory with one door after the other. Fortunately I didn't get stuck in an endless loop like in countless dreams and we reached the final gate.

I left my chair and approached this normal size wooden door. The instructor was also there with his usual mischievous grin, stating we gotta 'fight the skeleton'.
So this was the final boss, or rather the only opponent we'd encounter.  I realized that though this was a firearms training course I had no guns or other weapons. Some of the girls wielded long spears, but their straw outfits and stone masks looked extremely cumbersome Not to speak that these were children. Anyway, I was put in front. Gotta look cool for the girls. The instructor peeked through the keyhole, and with a nod proclaimed 'is there!' before stepping back and letting me handle things. Oh great! It was clear that this was a real undead skeleton monster, not an instructor in a suit. Girl pressure from behind intensified...

In a moment of lucidity I remembered I had a certain tupper to handle such situations, but being an idiot, instead of summoning Alice, I looked at my arm and tried to manifest some living metal spines myself. Of course that didn't work. I was just Bernd, not Alice. No super powers other that getting along well with little girls. I carefully opened the door that would open to the outside for  few millimeters and stepped back to see if the skeleton would come outside. Needless to say it didn't. The girls got impatient. With a sigh I did what I had to do and opened the door and went inside. There was a long dark corridor leading into darkness that looked very much like a mediocre video game. The girls pushed me forward without mercy. After a brief moment of silence there was a creepy monster moan that kicked me out of the dream.

I felt really disappointed, I would have loved to continue adventuring with the girls...
Waking up and recollecting what had happened, Alice suggested the girls were Maenads - the frenzied female followers of Dionysos. One of the most ancient Greek gods who probably pre-dates Greek culture, originating in older Indo-European myths. The girls were calm, but certainly fierce and looked very cool.


This was deepest prehistoric folklore from the dawn of humanity. Such ritual costumes exist all over the world, not just in the alpine region but also in West Africa, South America, India and Papua. But in Europe this is mostly confined to the alps where pagan traditions have survived the millennia.

Awesome dream, I wish it would have lasted longer. Attempts to re-enter it proved unsuccessful.