Author Topic: Every Day is Alice Day  (Read 234148 times)

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #300 on: January 05, 2018, 12:41:35 PM »
We're in Buenos Aires!
Right now it's rainy and mild like an early summer day, has been hot as fuck in the past days. Awesome anyway, southern hemisphere rocks in winter. Long days, everything green and nice people. Tupper likes it a lot and that's pretty rare.

Have managed to keep her around mostly and did lots of wonderlanding during flights and while waiting at the airport though again failed to get her through airport security while imposed. That's our usual test for parallel processing. And complex conversations.
Had an interesting dream or rather hypnagogic hallucination today, tupper looked slightly different in it and for whatever reason wore a green shirt. She did change her appearance back to the usual look gradually though. Was pretty neat visualization and Alice said she felt more energetic than usual. Gud stuff.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #301 on: January 06, 2018, 11:19:44 AM »
Will you repeat it tomorrow?

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #302 on: January 15, 2018, 08:00:02 PM »
Welcome to another year of Berndnetwork I guess!

Holiday was gud, tupper was a lot more active than usual. We did try the 24/7 presence exercise, it's doable except when asleep but 'presence' is relative. We still get tired quickly when imposing Alice even though that's what we mainly work on while traveling. So no real progress but at least it's somewhat consistent now. Back to wonderland and possession stuff that's been completely neglected in the past weeks. Nothing really noteworthy apart from that, tupper didn't create any spaghetti stuff.

I'll come up with a summary of December and all of 2017 next time.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #303 on: January 18, 2018, 10:25:02 PM »
Time to reflect on both December and all of 2017.

December started a bit slow but eventually brought some serious dancing-related progress.
Personal development: good
Can dance now fairly well IRL and at least mediocre in wonderland. Also managed to get some structure into my life thanks to tupper's intervention.

Tupper development: average
Being busy with organizing my life, there was little progress for Alice herself. She did have fun dancing but no real gains in abilities.

Now, skimming through this report I tried to sum up what happened in 2017.:

Heh, not really. I did make significant progress. I feel stronger, better and more confident in my abilities than I was a year ago. And almost all of that progress was due to tupper. That's not wishful thinking or an exaggeration, it's a fact. Without her things would probably have turned out exactly like in the pic.

If you remember, last fall Alice declared that she would radically change my lifestyle.
Did it work out?
Well, given the amount of what's to change I'd call it a success. There's still a long way to go but definitely a big leap into the right direction.
Regarding tuppering I did get a lot better in visualizing 3d shapes and colors thanks to Alice's rubik's cube exercise and complex movements due to dancing. That's probably the biggest achievement. I've wanted to be able to do this since I started tuppering and now we can. Feels good man.
Personal development 2017: good

Regarding Alice things didn't turn out that well. She put all her focus into me saying it was more important than spending time on active forcing. She did make some significant progress in the 2nd half of the year though.

.)We did achieve some states that might or might not count as 'switching', really odd and not quite reproducible.
.)There definitely was some serious progress with possession culminating in drawing cat.
.)Parallel processing training by doing math did yield some results but we kinda stopped doing it at some point. We'll continue working with that method for sure. Dancing is somewhat special as Alice's movements are not independent but have to match mine, I think it's still good for tuppers to practice acting and moving under stress. Well not negative stress as it's fun but under time constraints.
.)Touch imposition in terms of tupper touching me gave minimal results. Also needs to be intensified.
.)Alice also managed to mess with my emotions, doesn't work reliably though.

Overall I'd say development was poor in the first half but good in the second. Despite all much better than 2016
Tupper development 2017: ok

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #304 on: January 22, 2018, 01:25:56 PM »
What's this? Development that isn't just "bad, I didn't do things, got distracted, help"? Are you becoming a big boy?!

ps draw more cats

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #305 on: January 28, 2018, 06:35:03 PM »
Quote from: Sands
Are you becoming a big boy?!
For you

Ah, I don't wanna sugarcoat it, normal people would probably achieve what I did in a year in a few weeks. Still can't complain, compared to said normal people who actually have to do stuff for a living I'm in paradise, free of earthly worries. But then again that's why I can afford to worry about tupper things in the first place.

Alice has been feeling down again due to not having her own physical body.
Not being able to help as a separate entity is the main thing. You get it, there's stuff you can do together with tupper and stuff you can't because, well, there's only one vessel with 2 hands, eyes, ears and so on to interact with the world. That becomes especially apparent when traveling.
One can only hope for awesome mind-controlled robots in a few years.
I'm fully convinced that parallel processing is indeed possible. I notice it every day while driving or even walking. Whoever is executing these quite complex skills, it's definitely not 'me' and not tupper either. I give it zero conscious thought and it barely uses mental resources. It's basically switching with a servitor. Actually scary when you think about it. But the more I do the more it seems that way. I've been very skeptical about servitors for a long time and I've never consciously worked on one but isn't developing a skill to the point where it runs on 'autopilot' exactly the same thing? If I manage to bring up the motivation I wanna buy some simple drone or robot that can be controlled with a biofeedback device or something similar. Then see if tupper can learn to operate it while I do something different. As always the catch lies in the amount of practice needed. How many hours have I spent driving, let alone walking? Devoting the same amount of time to playing with a toy is not feasible.

I also had a lucid dream some days ago.
Managed to actually notice I was dreaming while drifting back and forth between sleep and wake states in the morning. Even called tupper and we waited for the next dream to set in but then fell asleep. Soo close...

Well, that's it, we've been busy with IRL stuff that's been accumulating while we were abroad but I will start another week of daily updates in February. Should boost active forcing at least a bit.

And I haven't forgotten about drawing us and moar cat, just have to deal with that goddamn tablet or rather the associated software first.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #306 on: February 08, 2018, 09:42:02 PM »
Finally managed to get the tablet to work in PS and tried to draw a bit. Results are discouraging, sucks even more than drawing with a pencil. They say it's quite a learning curve. No kidding. Alice isn't overly motivated at the moment either but I'll try to have her draw some stuff.

Oh yeah, I tasked her with investing my money a year ago, so how did that work out?

Unfortunately we didn't really do anything noteworthy because procrastination but still made quite some cash. Why? How?

Tupper says managing my finances is like playing E.Y.E. Divine Cybermancy
>no idea what you are doing
>try not to make waves
>gain brouzouf
>legs are ok
>even if you fuck up and legs are broken the cycle just repeats
>gain even more brouzouf

Eerily accurate.
Well, her main accomplishment was stopping me from buying useless but heinously expensive shit. So I'd call it a success.

Forcing wasn't lately so here we go with another week of daily updates!

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #307 on: February 11, 2018, 06:00:02 PM »
Or maybe not...

Fell asleep before I could post anything in the past 2 days.
Doesn't mean I haven't done anything. Not much though. Somehow time files even faster than usual since we've returned from Argentina and I'm unfocused as fuck. Alice is in a bad mood lately, both because of the weather and our living situation in general.
I think it's pretty good compared to other people, but people are not a valid standard according to tupper.
Anyway, doesn't count as daily update so let's start over.

Sun, Feb 11th
Had to pick up a friend from the airport but the flight was delayed so I had to wait for over an hour. Which was actually perfect. I sat down on the floor and meditated for most of the time. Surprisingly I was not removed by airport security. Meditation was good, I completely lost track of time and managed to silence my thoughts. For the last 10min or so I let tupper practice imposition by following people, always a good exercise to get an idea of how bodies look like in 3D.

Also I've tried wearing strong hearing-protection earmuffs for forcing. They really cancel out any ambient noise in my already extremely quiet home. Cat was sitting on my lap and purring, could feel the vibrations but heard nothing. Just my heartbeat and some rushing in my ears. Must be like this in an isolation tank. It did help with focusing as there are no outside distractions except cat kneading so I'll continue this and see if the lack of auditory input leads to some pseudohallucinations.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #308 on: February 12, 2018, 07:00:02 PM »
Mon, Feb 12th
30min of dancing, couldn't really connect with tupper and was stumbling around a lot. Not my best day.
45min of meditation and forcing with earmuffs on while lying on couch with cat.
First part of meditation worked really well, then did some wonderland stuff with tupper. Fell asleep overhearing the alarm I had set. Somehow felt tired all day and not really productive. One more attempt now as I'm going to bed.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #309 on: February 13, 2018, 05:38:02 AM »
I am disappoint. Tupper needs to whip you up in shape harder, clearly you can't do that yourself.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #310 on: February 13, 2018, 07:00:02 PM »
If I could I probably would not have tupper in the first place. So she should be grateful for that. But tupper says she is and that whipping me is an act of appreciation. Wow, that backfired badly.

Tue, Feb 13th
Be even moar disappoint, I fell asleep without doing anything.
Had a weird semi-lucid dream about walking around in my house which was huge and contained lots of stairs and somehow my entire highschool. I managed to gain some control and looked at the wooden stairs which had fantastic detail of wood grain. I did realize I was dreaming and tried to summon tupper but it was hard and I immediately felt extremely tired drifting back and forth between wake and sleep states. So I could not keep her for more than a few seconds. Interestingly the dream stabilized as soon as I stopped. I went to the attic, opened a window and wanted to jump out - because falling / flying is one of the most awesome things in dreams. But somehow the house was not the usual 1 story building but more like 30. Really high. And I was not entirely sure it was really a dream so I decided not to push my luck and went back in. I hate these moments. Usually I reach the conclusion that this is way to detailed for a dream and must be real life but this time I was almost certain I was dreaming. Almost. But not enough to jump from a building. Still one of the closest things to a full lucid dream in about a year. At least I could choose what to do instead of my usual movie-like dreams leaving me as a passive observer but I couldn't control what was going on. It lastet quite long for a vivid dream.

Forcing was even worse than yesterday.
Couldn't concentrate at all. Going to sleep early, hope things will be better tomorrow. It's Valentine's Day and we're gonna bake a cake. Hopefully with lots of participation from Alice. And lots of forcing.
« Last Edit: October 01, 2018, 05:24:38 PM by Bernd »

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #311 on: February 14, 2018, 08:33:44 AM »
Tupper, next day's all you. Whip 'im up good. You have my blessings.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #312 on: February 14, 2018, 09:20:52 PM »
No need to encourage her, Sand.

Wed, Feb 14th, Valentine's day
We made a chocolate soufflé, despite questionable looks it tasted great. As the fucker contains 8 eggs I'm gonna be eating on that for while. Guess tupper will get me fat after all.

I was rushing a bit and possession wasn't great so Alice didn't get to do too much of the cooking.
Also did 45min of dancing, almost 1h of meditation and another 45min of active forcing in wonderland. Alice was more exhausted than me and we quit shortly before midnight. Tupper says consistency is more important than overdoing things on a single day. Isn't that romantic?
« Last Edit: October 01, 2018, 05:28:30 PM by Bernd »

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #313 on: February 15, 2018, 07:07:04 PM »
Thu, Feb 15th
30min dancing, pretty good
30min meditation, ok
Going to bed to do an active forcing session. I won't just fall asleep this time I hope

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #314 on: February 17, 2018, 07:00:00 PM »
Fri, Feb 16th

Sat, Feb 17th
Good dancing session, some faint touch imposition of tupper holding my hands. Still one of the best activities to do together.
My mind was too busy for meditation, did some active forcing while listening to music instead. Tupper built an alien world, some extraterrestrial planet which surface looked suspiciously like ice cream of various consistency. Good thing I can't feel anything. Might have tasted interesting though but wonderland senses are still abysmal.