Made some progress with possesion and arguably even switching.
Not sure how reproducible it is, there's still enormous variation from day to day.
Gonna step up wonderland stuff for a change now.

Still not much wonderland work.
But tupper got better at possession and can now reliably cook and shoot. What more could you want?
Did some basic firearms training course and Alice was really good, better than me because more ambitious. Hates failing, did not. Also she spent a considerable amount of time patting the bald instructor on the head and mimicking his movements. Luckily only in imposed version and not via possession. Dont ask me why. I managed not to laugh.

Heh, never thought I'd see you again here!



How about updating your diary instead of in addition to shitposting?
inb4 no relplies ever again like always

We DID make some progress last year, Alice got significantly better at possession / switching and learned how to operate weapons from handguns to heavy autocannons. For real, not wonderland stuff.
She's definitely become stronger and even more fierce, not nearly enough though.

Whoa, you still around?
And I thought no one would ever come back to this place.
I'll continue updating to the very end. That's the path of the true loser.

It's Spring!



Nature is blooming and we started meditating outside again. It's not going very well, focus has deteriorated even more and I catch myself thinking about the most insignificant nonsense while trying to meditate. In contrast, wonderland visualization seems to have improved somewhat even though we did dot train extensively. Therefore one week of daily updates focusing on meditation and wonderland stuff!

Arigato!

Had a series of weird dreams including a lucid moment but realizing you're dreaming and doing what you want are 2 different things so - very little tupper involvement. She did appear in the non-lucid part telling me what I did was stupid. Very much like IRL. Too realistic to realize it was a dream.
Alice rarely appars in dreams andeven less so has her own. There was one some days ago which was pretty hilarious, switching between me observing her and POV.

But back to forcing. Meditation during the day while walking or waiting really didn't go well. Drifted off to intrusive thoughts and daydreams like I never meditated before. It went better in the evening while laying in bed but nothin I'd call good. Did some minor stuff in wonderland but nothing noteworthy.

What did she say was stupid? Was it indeed stupid?

Yeah, pretty stupid but the overall dream made no sense whatsoever so I guess it doesn't really count.

You perform walking meditation like a Zen monk? How is that?

Well basically you run around trying to think about nothing. It works wherever I have to go. Also I live close to a huge park so I walk there almost every day, observe nature and try to clear my mind. It's still too cold to sit anywhere for longer than a few minutes so walking is the only option.

Today it didn't go well either. Only a little better towards the end. Too many things on my mind.
Wonderland activity was better, Alice brought the giant fleas and we rode around some buildings and through tall grass. Imagine an elephant safari, pretty much that. Only the elephants were brightly copper colored fleas adorned with bells and ribbons and pretty fast for their size.



needless to say this is all Colonel's fault
Ended in intense tupper cuddling so good stuff.

Alice says she's skeptical about bronies who watch other people drool but maybe you can get her to post, she's got her own account here, hasn't used it in years because meh.

Mh, Alice started typing but half way was like fuck it, don't wanna post.
She's been generally unenthusiastic for a while now having lost her initial craving for adventure.
So I guess I'll have to sum it up, maybe she'll post something short in the next days.

You bet she was concerned. She says she often feels like a parent having to keep a dreamy child from running before a truck. Pretty accurate.
Hard to say about who remembers what, our thoughts and memories often mix and the brain is great in forming a coherent story out of dream fragments afterwards. She remembers telling me to go home but didn't realize it was a dream. It was like observing me IRL. Nothing about the lucid part. There's only one dream where we really managed to interact with each other and at least tupper had good control over what was going on, that was awesome. Not for the poor dream characters involved though. Alice invaded their home, ate their food and threw their pets over the fence. I was like wait you can't do that but she insisted this was a dream so you can. Man, one day I need to draw this.

Regarding walking, usually we walk together talking and holding hands but not for meditation. Then her job is just to knock me out of daydreaming, or talking to myself or her. So it's rather her telling me to shut up than the other way round
unthinkable insolence anyway
We did train this tug-of-war style, once Alice is active and worked up I can't ignore or silence her. May take a bit but she can break through. Very proud of that.



It's much harder with possession though, on good days she can stop or override my movements but not consistently. So still lots of work there.

Meditation was a little better today after a bad start again, tupper had to interfere a lot to remind me I was supposed to not think about anything.
Practiced dancing for about 45min, hadn't done that for a while, always fun.
No wonderland stuff until now, will try before going to sleep.