Tulpas > Tulpa Diaries

Imposing fuzzballs

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TulpaCouple:
Let's see if this time I can keep a progress thread updated relatively often!


A bit of an intro here, I've been forcing for a year--nearly a year and a half now. I have two tulpas, Jaden and Giselle. Both are small quadruped animals of their own design. Through a lot of set backs and difficulties we have managed to come very far in imposition. At this point I would say we are finished with imposing presence and touch (including warmth, weight, etc) while sight and sound still need some work. Some days they will be fully imposed the whole day while other days they will be faded and will take some dedicated forcing to 'work our way back up to it'. More often than not they stay imposed when I am smart enough to not worry about it to much. Reading together, watching a movie, hanging out at work, these are times when they are there without question. But if I were to look Jaden in the face and try to stare at him directly for a long period of time, he tends to fade or I accidentally stare right through him. There have been times when we would have a long conversation that gets interrupted by my accidental 'spot checking' that just destroys the whole illusion all together. Very frustrating.

Giselle brought up the fact that we never really worked too hard on smelling imposition--They have a scent but I guess it's not as solid as it could be. She mentioned that since smell is often linked to memory that perhaps getting that solidified will help keep the rest of the imposition work stable. We'll see what happens I guess.

This log will basically document experiments in imposition(and keeping it stable) as well as just going over the ups and downs of life with tulpas. We will probably discuss lucid dreaming and how it relates to them as well, as that has been something we have been working at recently.


If Nate, my fiance, decides to post, I'll probably have him make a sub-account for him as well. His tulpas already have them available if they choose to use them, but they are rather private individuals, so we'll see where that goes.

Jaden:
Actually I'm going to add my own addition to today's entry. Today was a real shitty day for Kate at work, she woke up with a blinding migraine and it never left until around 8 this evening. She ended up going home early from work and taking a nap. When she woke up we forced for a while and decided that we would attempt to at least sort of switch--Me taking the lead while she kind of backs off and dissociates herself from the body as best she can. I already have trouble feeling the body itself so it worked out in our favor as I didn't feel the migraine as painfully as she had been. I ended up taking care of the major responsibilities of the evening and assisted Nate in cooking dinner.

It was an interesting experience to say the least. I'm not too fond of possession really, but if we hadn't done it we probably wouldn't have gotten much done today, so there was that.

As far as imposition practice goes, we got none of that done today. This was the first migraine I've really actively experienced, and even then I only really felt about half of it and it STILL was awful. Terrible pain in the ass.

Sands:
Finally someone working on imposition. Maybe we'll go there one day. I know, >implying I will stop being lazy. Hope you do keep us updated because progress reports are what will help people a ton when written well - and they'll help you too, if you ever want to write a guide or something and want to refresh your memory.

I found smell surprisingly easy, but I rarely smell the air around me, so it doesn't really stay for that long and then you gotta refresh that scent memory.

Gotta ask, you ever noticed weird things happening after you have been working on imposition this long? I did some of it ages ago and I dunno, have had some actual hallucinations I thought were real until I took a second look. Luckily nothing too crazy, but something that seemed plausible for a while. Not sure if I'd call it something dangerous yet, but I think this tupperforcing process and especially imposition just do something to you. All tupper communities always have the NOTHING COULD EVER GO WRONG AND NOTHING BAD WILL HAPPEN stance on forcing and imposition, so I'm sorta asking around and seeing if people have noticed something strange. Not necessarily dangerous, again, but just something strange.

Also, possession can be a lifesaver when you're sick or in pain. It's much easier to handle everything when you can sorta take a time out.

TulpaCouple:
As far as 'weird things' are concerned, you already see hallucinations. Usually something you think is a face or a person that is actually just a tree or something. We just brush it off very quickly. Same goes for audio hallucinations--hearing your name. Or have you ever been sure you felt your phone vibrating in your pocket, or were you sure a spider was crawling on you? These are actually full on hallucinations half the time, sometimes even with two aspects at once (ie Both hearing the vibrating phone and feeling it when it was not vibrating/not even in your pocket)

When I first started imposition I was constantly searching for hallucinations, so I found them. All of the above were more pronounced as I was purposely paying attention to them. Much like how we are more aware of hypnogogia than the average person despite it happening just as much, I think some might be more aware of just how faulty our eyesight actually is. There's actually a TED talk on hallucination--they were talking about how common they are, but how few people will mention them for fear of seeming insane. It's really very very interesting.

But aside from those common things, no. I haven't seen random nonexistent people nor have I seen my nastier intrusive thoughts pop up in my vision. Sometimes I have difficulty imposing Giselle if she is running around switching forms on me, but that's the only time there seem to be any distortions.


I think mostly it's like everything else in tulpaforcing--People often worry in the beginning that their tulpa will talk to them so much they will get distracted from work when in reality it is more common to be so distracted from work that one forgets to talk to their tulpa. Same pretty much has happened as far as imposition--rather than Jaden or Giselle distracting me from what's physical, what's physical still often distracts me from seeing them clearly. It's very easy still for me to break through. Only when I'm seriously not even thinking about it is it pretty solid for long periods of time.

But that's just my experience. No demons or spooky entities seen here. Definitely always keeping an eye out for anything off.

Sands:

--- Quote from: TulpaCouple on September 25, 2013, 01:34:53 PM ---Much like how we are more aware of hypnogogia than the average person despite it happening just as much...

--- End quote ---

I think you hit something really well here, as this is one thing that I definitely have been noticing more. Before, I don't think I ever really got hypnagogia, but now it happens very often. Maybe that and hallucinations otherwise for some of us are happening more because we trained ourselves to notice it, like how you said. It still would mean that it does something to us, but I guess I've never really seen it outright dangerous. But, it does something and it might be a good idea to talk about it a bit more in tupper communities. All what has happened has made me pretty iffy about suggesting this to someone with a very wild and uncontrollable imagination, though. It could help them and teach them those important skills of controlling your imagination, or maybe they'll completely lose it. Wouldn't want that happening.

I think we're being some kind of guinea pigs now, maybe we'll understand a bit more about this in the future and are able to give better information. At least that's what I'm hoping for. Before, we didn't really know what happens when you have tuppers for a long time. Now we're becoming those people and will be able to tell. Maybe. Unless we start attacking windmills in the future.

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