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« on: March 26, 2019, 07:41:57 PM »
Um excuse me that's a very personal question.
But since you asked politely, I'll tell you.
I refuse to read old journals because they make me cringe, so I don't know where we were three years ago. I've even forgotten last year.
Their forms have gone unchanged. It's too much work, you know. We've spent years on the details of their current forms--a labor of love--so I can't imagine them being anything but ponies. Literally, I can't imagine it. Not that I mind. In spite of received wisdom, I knew what I was doing when I created them. Their forms are as much them as anything else. To want them to change would be like wanting them to be different people.
And, again, let me restate how much work went into their forms. This is very important. Do you know how hard it is to develop a clear and distinct mental image of a wing? It's insane. I don't recommend it, unless you hate yourself. There are a lot of feathers.
And of course there's hair. Sure, manes are one thing. Rendering follicles is a wild ride. But they're horses; they have coats too, and their coats are comprised of hair. A lot of hair. Short, soft hairs that do what they want and render in sections like a modern game on a subpar pc. It's a nightmare. I mean, it's a dream come true, but that dream falls into the subcategory of nightmare.
But I ramble. Progress? I don't know my down from up anymore. I can securely say that we cannot switch. Well, what does the community consider switching these days? I'd say we're masters of possession, that state in which tulpas take motor control of either a limb or the whole body but the host remains aware. But in what I mean by switching, that state in which tulpas take motor control of either a limb or the whole body and the host loses awareness, we are lacking. Not that we've tried much, since I was scared away by the agonizing terror one feels before their consciousness snaps. Our focus has been on real-world interaction and imposition things, as alluded to above. That's going as well as ever, or better than ever before, even. It's tough to measure. I always think I'm doing well, but then we discover some other detail we can use, some sliver of their being concealed, and I think everything I've done up to that discovery was the airy fantasizing of a neophyte. I'm probably not wrong.
So, yes, progress. You know, since you're working so hard, maybe we'll work harder, too. Can't hurt, right? What should we do? It's been ages since I've properly meditated. Maybe we'll try some of that.