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Messages - TulpaCouple

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1
Tulpa Diaries / Re: Imposing fuzzballs
« on: October 28, 2013, 01:11:48 AM »
Eh I doubt it. He's not interested at all in any more full fledged tulpas. He's already had some of those high functioning servitors from stories who do their thing and that's all there really is to it. He's not too concerned about anything like that happening in this situation. It's not really a tulpa, just like I said, a personified thing, a way of communicating to himself. Unless I guess you consider a tulpa to be that, I guess but, whatever.

2
Tulpa Diaries / Re: Imposing fuzzballs
« on: October 27, 2013, 11:51:03 PM »
Wedding stuff makes it difficult to be online too often, but I try to pop on via the phone when I can.

Dealing with having a bummed out tulpa is sad and frustrating, but things are looking a lot better now.

Not too much that is new otherwise. Nate has a new tulpa-ish thing, but it's more like a direct personified representation of his subconscious, so I guess it's more servitor-esque. Luke describes it as having one of those cheesy omnipotent sounding voices which cracks me up. He doesn't really talk unless spoken to and isn't interested in really doing any more than that. So that's something. Form is a phoenix made of light, so okay.

3
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« on: October 15, 2013, 02:13:20 AM »
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4
Tulpa Diaries / Re: Imposing fuzzballs
« on: October 14, 2013, 04:05:35 PM »
Not really a big deal--Just a friend of Jaden's who happens to be involved in a bit of drama right now. I don't really want to go on about it in detail as it's not really progress report related.

Been distracted with pokeymans since it came out but trying to keep a constant visualization going on the tups. This is where small tulpas are easier, it's very easy to keep them in my field of vision since they can fit almost anywhere they like even in a crowded car.

Nate's begun taking some supplements to help with his ADHD-inattentive issues. We'll see if this helps him force a bit easier. Right now it's a constant battle to stay focused on anything for longer than 10 minutes. His brother also suffers from the same disorder but has found a crutch that helps him rather well--he keeps his hands busy while trying to do wonderland activities. For him, he twirls a stick around in his hands while he paces, and that amount of motion is simple enough that he does not need to focus on it but it keeps his mind active enough to not die of boredom and distractions when trying to focus. Nate may try something like this if it helps--I know when he was in school it was easier for him to focus on work if he was allowed to fiddle with things. Maybe we'll see some really great improvement by using this sort of physical focusing device, who knows.

Jaden's issues with his form have almost been completely resolved. He is able to immerse himself in the wonderland properly again, and to be honest I think it's made imposing him easier. Now he's around the same level of imposition as Giselle is. Maybe since he feels more realistic my mind accepts him as such? No idea.

Also, Nate's sister somehow found my tulpa blog. She's not sure what a tulpa is yet though and currently thinks it's a shared blog between me and a few friends. But she's decided to follow it and read through the posts, yikes. Probably going to sit down with Nate and figure out what we are going to do about this.


Edit: Suddenly 5 replies!

Reading your posts here, I have a few questions:

What are your eyes normally focused on when you look at Jaden/Giselle?

What happens when you focus your eyes on something far away/close up, if anything?

How do you handle environmental interactions that should happen, but don't (physically)?
[Like if Jaden jumps on a pillow, the pillow should depress. Do you just ignore this?(it can seem more problematic for those with larger/heavier tuppers)]


Progress logs like this can be really helpful, thanks for posting here.

Focused on them. You can actually do this yourself. Put a finger near your face and focus on it. Pull it back to around an area where your tulpa's face would be. Move the finger away and your eyes defocus on everything else and focus on that empty spot. If you could see your tulpa, they would be right there.

If I focus on other things they sort of blur--Actually when they are blurred out they are more solid for me, so it's pretty useful to look near them rather than directly at them right now.

As far as what happens with physical objects, what we've done is to consider there to be a "wonderland overlay" on top of the physical world. For us what this ends up meaning is Jaden can squish into the wonderland pillow while the physical pillow isn't moving. I can see in my visualization the pillow move but physically it still doesn't really react. It's sort of a double image really. Pretty much what Sands described as seeing two states of the object at the same time. I can imagine it would be possible to make this fully realistic and to even overwrite the physical object the tulpa touches, but I don't know if I want to go that far with it. I like the ghost image effect anyway, and it lets my tulpas interact with objects that they shouldn't be able to--fun for them.

Glad I could help!

5
Tulpa Diaries / Re: Imposing fuzzballs
« on: October 14, 2013, 03:52:53 AM »
Giselle turned one today. We had a really nice evening after work together.

There was a bit of drama with Jaden, over the same specific person I mentioned earlier. He's stressed out about it and honestly I've gotten a headache from all of the tension going on about this.

Things have been well otherwise. Continuing to impose, impose, impose.

6
Off-Topic / Re: ms paint challenge 2 electric boogaloo
« on: October 11, 2013, 02:03:03 AM »
PFFFF



I can't stop laughing

7
Tulpa Diaries / Re: Imposing fuzzballs
« on: October 09, 2013, 12:37:41 PM »
It was a small but rather heavy argument about a specific person. They have rather different opinions, especially when it comes to this one specific girl. I didn't get to listen in for too long since I was at work so if there was anything else I must have missed it.

8
Tulpa Diaries / Re: Imposing fuzzballs
« on: October 08, 2013, 06:36:09 PM »
Continuing to realize how much imposition relies on serious visualization skills rather than memorizing the individual form. Giselle surprised me in a new form today, but she was just as imposed as her usual form was. I realized I was quickly able to comprehend her form and the space it took in the world and that's why my mind was able to see it very quickly. Or perhaps part of it was that Giselle knew the form inside and out and since we share a mind that knowledge was mine as well. Not sure.

Had a big old forcing headache today though from Giselle and Jaden discussing something rather emotionally. It was interesting to hear a discussion take place that I was not a part of, this is not something I walk in on too often.

9
Tulpa Diaries / Re: Imposing fuzzballs
« on: October 07, 2013, 04:52:20 PM »
Decided to spend part of the day sketching my environment and incorperating the imposed fuzzballs into the picture. It had interesting effects. I found that when I took in the image and began to draw, when I looked back up to them I had a guaranteed full flash of 100% imposition that lasted longer than usual, but then I still had some difficulty maintaining it when searching for details--would 'look through' them and make them fade to the background a bit. They have been enjoying the attention at least. Giselle thinks this should work very well in the long run. Maybe expect sketches to show up in this progress report.

I can only imagine how hard this would be if I was still having difficulty with anatomy errors in visualization.

We also messed with lighting a bit more. JDBar's new guide has been pretty nice in that regard, they have a more solid look when imposed for sure. Tried imposing a small handheld game system as well. The lighting directly affected Jaden realistically but not the environment. It sort of has a fuzzy effect I guess in a dark room, but it's not accurate. Sort of makes sense I guess. Applying shading to them is really helping in dark locations which I surprisingly have had a lot of trouble keeping them imposed. Previously it was giving me difficulty--there would be times when I would hallucinate them too bright in the area, which would break very quickly due to how fake it would look. Trying to make the shading come naturally and practicing having the tulpas walk in and out of dark rooms to prevent that sort of issue.

Again it's just a matter of making the process automatic. Fingers crossed.

10
Questions and Answers / Re: Tulpa complaining about not having energy
« on: October 01, 2013, 09:47:23 PM »
Whenever my tulpas end up feeling lethargic, actually getting them active seems to help--either making them do something different for a change or even having an active debate seems to help. It helps to give them more attention and also is helpful to have them do things that makes them think actively.

Forcing will definitely help strengthen his voice. My tulpas always feel energized after we active force. We had given it up for a while, trying to only passive, but honestly since we started forcing actively again I cannot recommend it enough. Their progress skyrocketed when we returned to it.

11
General Discussion / Re: Tulpae Awareness
« on: September 30, 2013, 09:39:16 PM »
I'd honestly prefer public knowledge of multiplicity and DID to be a little bit better before the phenomenon becomes any more prevalent. The way these people are viewed is rather horrid and seeing as how similar the tulpa phenomenon is to healthy multiples(since some would argue that healthy multiplicity is actually comprised of accidental tulpas and vice versa) I feel like we would only be adding fuel to the fire rather than helping the situation, at least as we are now.

Maybe in the future things will change, but as it is now there are still people who lose their jobs, children, etc. because of their multiplicity, even if they do not suffer from it as a true disorder and it is as simple and positive as the tulpa phenomenon has been.

I feel if people had better understanding of how a mind could behave differently from the norm and they were treated seriously then we might see people creating tulpas with a more serious mindset. Maybe.

Right now I could go either way, but I'd rather not, uh, advertise tulpa creation so boldly. I saw a tumblr post that was getting a few notes that was essentially "Lifehack: Bored or lonely?? Make a tulpa!!!" which made me cringe. If the tulpa phenomenon spreads, I hope it's not in that fashion.

12
Off-Topic / Re: Art General
« on: September 30, 2013, 12:28:52 AM »
hyooman Giselle




regular giselle and jaden











And trying to draw way too many tulpas here-- http://i.imgur.com/AFWy3PP.jpg


edit- bee and puppycat fanart/drawing of us huehue



edit edit okay I drew giselle as human in this style as well as Nate and the gang because it's fun




13
Tulpa Diaries / Re: Imposing fuzzballs
« on: September 29, 2013, 03:16:56 AM »
It's possible you had hypnagogia but did not notice it before, it often happens so quickly before bed that we just fall right asleep anyway.

Definitely agree about feeling a bit like guinea pigs in all this but hell, it's some pretty cool stuff. I have Nate here to keep me grounded if I ever start falling apart, but so far things have been going well through it all.

Spent a ton of time visualizing today. Making sure even when I'm not imposing I'm visualizing. Working on remembering details such as shadows, etc. to help them blend into the scenes so it isn't so easy to pick them out. The more realism I can achieve with that the less it seems I accidentally force my eyes through them.


We also have recently discovered one of our friends has an accidental tulpa/alter depending on how you want to feel about it. We talked to her about what's going on and helped her realize that there are others out there who have a personality like she does. It was a relief for her for sure but her boyfriend is still adjusting. He knew about her alternate personality but he thinks of him more like the classic DID trauma portrait--like he might push her around or force her to do things and make her black out and not remember etc, etc, so we're trying to see what we can do to help deal with that. As far as we are aware there is none of that funny business going on, and his concerns seem to stem more from his own internet searches and assumptions. He does want to get along with the tulpa, though, so I think things will be okay in the end. I hope so at least.

Giselle and I sat together yesterday and smoked and talked philosophy for hours while Nate was out. I rarely get the house to myself so it was nice to just be me and the tulpas. Jaden was so chill he just took the time to relax while just listening to us and commenting from time to time. It was a really nice night. Some of the best imposition in a while.

Thinking of trying lucid dreaming again, but it's hard to make myself commit to that. If anything we are now keeping a dream journal.
I haven't mentioned this, but as of recently, my tulpas have been a consistent part of my dream. They are rarely consciously sharing the dream, more like I am dreaming of or about them, but we did experience one strange lucid dream where Jaden and I both appear to have been conscious. We both share the memory of the dream at least. I was never sure if I bought into the whole dream sharing thing, but it certainly seemed pretty real in my experience. Very very odd, but very very cool. The oddest part was the dream revolved around Jaden rather than me, something definitely noticeable to me since dreams tend to always revolve around the dreamer. Again don't know what to say about all that, but just reporting what happened.

14
General Discussion / Re: Where'd your tulpa get their name?
« on: September 27, 2013, 06:28:17 PM »
Jaden chose it himself. I knew he was wanting something with the long a sound in it, but he wasn't vocal enough for me to hear the name clearly. After some searching I found the name and it instantly clicked as the name he had been repeating to me.

The only time I had heard that name previously was in a star wars game, so haha, it had been floating around in my subconscious memories for a while I guess when he grabbed it up.


As far as Giselle's name, she wanted something 'princess-y' After listing several names this one was her favorite.

15
Off-Topic / Re: Home cookin'
« on: September 25, 2013, 04:28:22 PM »
Yeah that's what we hear about baking. Nate's a bit obsessive with details when he cooks, which is why we are encouraging him to learn rather than me. I am awful at following recipes, I just throw in things and change it on the spot to fit my tastes. I know you can't do that with baking which is why I haven't messed with that too much. The only baking I do is pies on holidays. Or baked casseroles or whatever. But as far as bread and cookies, hahaha, not something we've been proficient at.

Right now we're getting ready to make some mushroom, spinach, and goat cheese stuffed chicken. Yum yum. Adding some garlic and caramelized onion too.

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