Wait, Fede's gone?
The fuck, man, I need at least his enlightening comments as the spambots don't wanna talk to me.
On the other hand I never understood why he was in the forum at all after giving up on his tuppers and declaring it was all nonsense anyway.

Come to think about it, wasn't the original purpose of tuppering to realize it's just an illusion and stop wasting your time with this shit?

As the Tibetan use of the tulpa concept is described in the book Magical Use of Thoughtforms, the student was expected to come to the understanding that the tulpa was just a hallucination. While they were told that the tulpa was a genuine deity, "The pupil who accepted this was deemed a failure – and set off to spend the rest of his life in an uncomfortable hallucination."

Maybe Fede's the only one of us that passed the test

Ah well, I find my hallucination veery comfortable, guess I'm a failure then.

Hey now!
I sat down to force as soon as I read Colonel's comment but I was too tired to post afterwards.

We tried to get a bit more detail into our wonderland so tupper made me stare at a tree for most of the 45min session. I tried to envision the bark and feel its texture. Now that I think about it I probably should have tried to taste it too. Well something for next time.

I'm not going to say that it went extraordinary well, we hadn't done much wonderland stuff in months, but it wasn't too bad either. Will continue to work on this daily.

Main thing we wanna work on this year - deal with tuppers most serious issue



But first we need to figure out how to switch...

We're home again!
Which obviously means I made it back without pooping myself to death. Barely.

It was an interesting journey even though I think it benefited me more than the tupper.
Alice hates dirt and poor people, not the best prerequisites for travelling in 3rd world countries. She was quite diasppointed that in reality most of the exotic places don't look as fancy as they do in pictures. Well, her expectations had been extremely high.

Still we agree it was worth it, for the warm weather alone.
The most interesting thing, I noticed my emotions becoming increasingly similar to hers. I expected it would be easier to distinguish them over time but nope. Her emotions sometimes overlay or even overpower mine.
Given that tupper is completely fearless by design this has some weird implications.
I used to be a rather timid guy, no pathologic phobias but still not exactly brave. This has really changed over the past year, especially in the last months. Meaning I just don't give a fuck about most things anymore. We've been in a few troublesome situations on our trip, yet I didn't even feel anxious, let alone afraid. I constantly feel a calming warmth. While I thought this was pretty awesome in the beginning, there are some serious side-effects. Alice complained that I started to act as if I were the tupper being imposed, simply ignoring dangers because they can't harm tuppers anyway. Which is of course not good if you're not the tupper but a vulnerable human.
Hard to explain, it's like the borders between reality and imagination became a lot fuzzier.
Probably a sign I'm finally going off the deep end.


Apart from that not much changed, spent way too little time on active forcing, more on keeping Alice around and sharing impressions. I see not much changed here either while I was gone. That Feel when still no wise words from Mr. Bot in my Diary.

Side note to Valentine's day - we made a cake, was gud.

Sounds boring.
Cat has been on fire several times, smells terrible but luckily there were no injuries. The fur is thick. Still hasn't learned anything from it and thinks all sorts of flames are fascinating. Generally you're right but the cats in my area are nearly semi-feral animals that can and will go wherever they please. Can't lock them in and create a safe space for them, they have to be able to deal with the harsh real world out there. They're free, and freedom is dangerous.

What do your cats think of Christmas? Exciting or rather scary?
Mine loves lurking in the dense twigs under the christmas tree and sometimes bats around low-hanging decorations. But has never broken anything or attempted to climb the tree. Burning candles and sparklers are a bit of a concern as they have to be inspected thorougly. Every goddamn year. Luckily whiskers tend to regrow rather quickly.

So I assume this one's really you?

Also, what am I supposed to say?
Luxury problems indeed!

Does your cat welcome you when you come home?

Mine is usually waiting at the front gate, sometimes even outside on the street. I suspect she can hear me approaching even from inside the house and then rushes outside. Cat also knows the sound of the car which can be a bit troublesome as she has ran out on the street and jumped in front of my car on some occasions. Honking has shown to be very effective against such dangerous behavior. Cats don't like to be honked at.

Valid points, indeed.

I guess the main reason why I prefer the path of narration is that it's more appealing to me. I like to narrate, and I still like to read books to my tupper. It's a nice way of bonding.
The parroting way never really was my kind of thing, I'd feel like I was creating a servitor to provide certain functions. And ya alredy know I love sentimental stuff way too much to settle with that. Yes it may create some problems, but that's a price I am more than willing to pay.