Author Topic: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log  (Read 41358 times)

Daecher

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Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #15 on: September 07, 2014, 11:16:09 PM »
Update time.

I've been making headway with visualization in the past week, but it's come to my attention that I just don't visualize often enough. Each time I go back to visualize either of my tulpas, it feels like I've completely forgotten what to see. With about a day or so in between sessions, the images don't stay in my memory.

Yeah, imagine that. All this time and I'm just now catching on.

My solution: I've got plenty of free time in my schedule, so I'm going to start using it productively. I'm going to fit in- at the very least- two hours each day working on visualization and get over this hump. I'll be sure to drop by the IRC much more often, so that everyone can bug the shit out of me about forcing. I need the motivation.
"Insane" is a just a word. There are no words for this.

Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #16 on: September 08, 2014, 06:24:45 AM »
Hey Daecher.

Bet you just thought about forcing but then pushed it aside because of something silly. Don't. Go force.

Daecher

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Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #17 on: September 28, 2014, 12:08:33 PM »
It's been about three weeks now, and things are going really well. Started doing the "Fodde Method" (as I've seen it called elsewhere on the forum) about a week ago on top of visualizing, and I'm pretty happy with the results.  Trying to visualize my tulpas takes much less effort now. Their forms aren't anywhere near perfect, but I can consistently "see" the shape and colors I know I should be. I generally work from the lowest detail to the highest because doing the opposite usually ends up with me focusing on a ridiculous amount of detail for a really small area and giving myself headaches (though my memory of that area is retained later on). Luna and Haya are happier with it either way, though. Having two attentionwhores means more work, but they seem satisfied with what progress I've made.

I'm not always getting in a solid two hours in a single visualization session, but I spread that time- if not more- over about three separate sessions a day. Divide and conquer, I suppose.
"Insane" is a just a word. There are no words for this.

Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #18 on: September 28, 2014, 08:43:17 PM »
Man I have one attentionwhore and that already is almost unbearable sometimes. Can't imagine life with two.

But have you played Minecraft enough recently?

Daecher

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Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #19 on: September 28, 2014, 09:54:50 PM »
The idea of playing "Lag: the Game" hasn't been too appealing, no.
"Insane" is a just a word. There are no words for this.

Daecher

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Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #20 on: September 29, 2014, 08:39:16 AM »
Sorry for the misunderstanding. I'm referring to your belief-implanting method described in your ultimate tupper guide.
"Insane" is a just a word. There are no words for this.

Daecher

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Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #21 on: September 29, 2014, 12:34:29 PM »
You're right about the visualization and hallucination, yes. I hadn't considered having them do it with me, though, so I'll check into that. I'll have a look at your suggestions to the Yogi as well.
"Insane" is a just a word. There are no words for this.

Daecher

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Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #22 on: October 14, 2014, 01:50:08 AM »
You know, most of my updates have been either about something I'm unhappy about- even if I've been making progress- but lately, I've been pretty satisfied with how things are going. I'm getting by in my daily life (most of what I do is schoolwork, anyway), and Luna and Haya are pretty happy with how things have been coming along.

It's been forever since I've legitimately thought about advancing towards sensory hallucination, now that I think of it. Recently I've focused more towards improving simpler techniques and making them a part of my daily life. I wouldn't say I've lost the motivation to move on to more difficult things, just that I'm back where I was when I first came here, with a little more experience and a lot more confidence.

...

Well, shit. Now what?
"Insane" is a just a word. There are no words for this.

Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #23 on: October 14, 2014, 07:31:10 AM »
Play more blocks with tuppers.

Daecher

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Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #24 on: November 16, 2014, 12:12:42 AM »
Not sure how to describe progress lately. I've been working towards feeling Luna and Haya (actual touch) as well as seeing them. I haven't consulted any guides in nearly a month, and my mindset is "I'll figure it out if I think hard enough." So far, it's been working, I'd say. Both of them have commented on how I'm more aware of their bodily presence at random times, and they even had the idea of changing clothes to fit the colder season to see if I'd notice (I noticed it that evening after classes).
At this point, I'm just throwing thoughts against a wall and seeing what sticks. I'll probably update again in another month or so- I'm just on some kind of roll and I want to stick to it until I break something.
"Insane" is a just a word. There are no words for this.

Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #25 on: November 16, 2014, 01:36:02 PM »
Welcome to the phase where you really won't be doing more than living your life with succubi.

Daecher

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Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #26 on: December 30, 2014, 03:10:06 PM »
Well, I'm adjusting little parts of my daily life to accommodate my "succubi," as Sands says it.

First, instead of jumping straight into gaming sessions like I normally do, I let Luna and Haya make decisions for me, if they aren't already playing during possession. Right now, they're only playing Minecraft (we're thinking of making a post in the Off-topic thread), but once I head back to university, I'll start introducing them to a wider range of games. They both share an interest in League of Legends and a couple shooters I have, but I'll need to work much harder towards switching before then; I'm making complete switching a goal to reach by the end of 2015.

Second, I've been making time for improving sensory imposition, particularly tactile imposition. Luna and Haya are consistently close, and their forms are detailed enough now that I can discern the feeling of their hair, their skin, and their clothes. They're surprisingly chill about me randomly asking to touch their face or run my fingers through their hair, and actually welcome it. I'm still having a hard time shaking off my intuition telling me that I'm not really feeling anything, though.

Finally, every once in a while, I'll spend some free time by having them sit in front of a blank, featureless wall and try to look at them instead of the wall. The best I've gotten so far is extremely transparent silhouettes that appear after about five solid minutes of not blinking. Interestingly enough, these silhouettes move just as I imagine Luna and Haya do, but the moment I try to move my eyes or blink, they're gone in an instant. I've seen these silhouettes rarely outside of practicing, but I'm happy that I can even see them at all.

Overall, a lot of progress has been made in the last month. I'm to the point where I can actually apply myself and find qualitative- though miniscule- results. What I'm working towards now is maintaining consistent practice techniques to progress further.
"Insane" is a just a word. There are no words for this.

Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #27 on: December 30, 2014, 03:15:05 PM »
I say it how it is. You have been warned.

Did you ever try imposition in a dark room? Not so dark that you can't see anything but dark enough for everything to appear as a silhouette. Doing some imposition there and trying to see the silhouettes of your tuppers can be breddy spoopy.

Have the tuppers found a giant ocean yet and forced you to watch as they travel through it for countless in-game days? I guess these days the oceans are slightly less boring, but...

MegaBusta

Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #28 on: December 30, 2014, 05:49:30 PM »
Your tulpas want to play MOBAS?  You better fix their tastes right quick.

Daecher

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Re: Daecher (and friends)'s Growth Log
« Reply #29 on: December 30, 2014, 09:46:47 PM »
That comes from my poor taste in games and lack of funds for others- it's no fault of their own.
"Insane" is a just a word. There are no words for this.