Maybe one day you'll be different...

Forum is deader than a racist walrus lost in the Detroit projects after dark
or my progress

But actually I like it that way. Feels cozy.

Alice's birthday was already a while ago. We went on a trip to southern France, cake was had, good times.

So I guess it's time to reflect on 1 year of tuppering.
My initial progress was staggering but the curve quickly flattened, even plunging into decay in fall. This is a general problem that keeps haunting me. I get obsessed with things easily and initially put an enormous amount of energy into them. But I can't keep that up very long. I also tend to get involved in far too much stuff simultaneously instead of focusing on what's important. This is of course pure poison to progress of any sort. Which in turn is pure poison to any motivation.
I almost lost Alice - I almost lost her. I couldn't hear her anymore and what's even worse, I couldn't feel her presence. After having grown accustomed to that feeling of being bathed in warm light, I felt horribly alone without her.
I'm not gonna lie, the issues we have since September are still not fully resolved. But I feel there is a way forward. There has to be.

Yeah, well no.
Unfortunately it ain't quite that easy.
Of course generally not giving a fuck is important but it ain't everything.

I was really surprised how much effort it took to get in touch with Alice after barely interacting with her for some weeks in fall. Thought she had become self-sustaining a long time ago and was strong enough to simply brush off such brief inconveniences. Well I dun goofed.

Nah, the only thing that really works for us is regular training. Fortunately tupper regains strength quickly through interaction but she can't do it on her own. In fact there's still next to nothing Alice can do on her own which is one of our main issues. You suggested working on her being more active when I'm not focusing on her, but we've had no success with that so far. Tupper still says she's simply K.O. as soon as I forget about her.
Any suggestions for training independence?

Guess that's true.
But the blackouts were just briefly annoying, then everything was back to normal. Whereas the overall decay really sucks. Still not fully back to the level we had reached.  No real progress in keeping Alice awake. I tried really hard to keep Alice around during Christmas festivities, it worked at least partly. Things are fine as long as we talk to each other but as soon as soon as I have some even slightly challenging task to solve she's out within seconds. It helps to make her count out loud but that gets really annoying after a while, or I get used to it and ignore it. Interacting with others is the hardest part. When I am sucked into some interesting conversation, tupper is completely forgotten. Which of course, is not well received. I'm now trying to keep her imposed and have her get my attention while talking to others. We'll see how this turns out.

Some good news for a change.
We've travelled quite a lot this year but Alice has been pestering me to go on a big trip for quite a while now. I was really hesitant because of all the fuss involved but it was no use. I mean, she's right, I love to see new and exotic places but I'm really lazy and don't like the preparations. Also, Alice has always been strongest and most active when we were on holidays due to the high amount of time we spent together. So we'll go on a journey for one and a half months, visiting several countries. Never been away that long, especially not on my own. But I won't be on my own. At least as long as I manage to keep her around. We'll have lots of time for forcing so I'm really excited how much Alice is going to develop in the coming weeks.

We're home again!
Which obviously means I made it back without pooping myself to death. Barely.

It was an interesting journey even though I think it benefited me more than the tupper.
Alice hates dirt and poor people, not the best prerequisites for travelling in 3rd world countries. She was quite diasppointed that in reality most of the exotic places don't look as fancy as they do in pictures. Well, her expectations had been extremely high.

Still we agree it was worth it, for the warm weather alone.
The most interesting thing, I noticed my emotions becoming increasingly similar to hers. I expected it would be easier to distinguish them over time but nope. Her emotions sometimes overlay or even overpower mine.
Given that tupper is completely fearless by design this has some weird implications.
I used to be a rather timid guy, no pathologic phobias but still not exactly brave. This has really changed over the past year, especially in the last months. Meaning I just don't give a fuck about most things anymore. We've been in a few troublesome situations on our trip, yet I didn't even feel anxious, let alone afraid. I constantly feel a calming warmth. While I thought this was pretty awesome in the beginning, there are some serious side-effects. Alice complained that I started to act as if I were the tupper being imposed, simply ignoring dangers because they can't harm tuppers anyway. Which is of course not good if you're not the tupper but a vulnerable human.
Hard to explain, it's like the borders between reality and imagination became a lot fuzzier.
Probably a sign I'm finally going off the deep end.


Apart from that not much changed, spent way too little time on active forcing, more on keeping Alice around and sharing impressions. I see not much changed here either while I was gone. That Feel when still no wise words from Mr. Bot in my Diary.

Side note to Valentine's day - we made a cake, was gud.

Quickest reply evar!

Thx man, we'll make it.
I'll try to be a bit more active now that I'm back so the Colonel has a 2nd user to pester.
And I sure hope he does, I don't nearly force as much as I 'd like to because lazy faggot.

That changes everything. Here's your updated reward:


Hope you can resolve tuppers' most serious issue soon!
^{also, nice job, this PR is now the one with the most images - keep going}