Author Topic: Every Day is Alice Day  (Read 537561 times)

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #75 on: May 18, 2016, 09:46:07 PM »
Thanks, I needed that!


Anyway, nothing really worth reporting.
We had some ups and downs lately, I wasted most of the time with useless stuff that filled my mind and prevented me from focusing. And of course I'm nowhere near your amount of forcing either. Few and really bad sessions. I'm really trying to set aside an hour for active forcing every day but it's soo hard when you're a lazy fuck like me. Who's the world-class procrastinator now?

Unfortunately casual passive forcing is no adequate replacement for intense active sessions and quickly weakens tupper's abilities to an unsettling degree.
Ah, there's one observation I made - staring at the flashing lights of Fede's Eye-Bo appears to produce different colors in different sessions. Haven't been able to figure out what causes this. Normally the white light looks reddish when passing through the eyelids, the darkness blueish due to fatigue of the retina's cones. High frequencies are purple. However, in one sessions I have seen intense persistent red and orange colors which fit nicely to a sundown scenery in wonderland.
More of that next time, I need to get some sleep now.
« Last Edit: March 27, 2023, 08:49:05 PM by Nele »

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Every Dorf is Alice Force
« Reply #76 on: June 01, 2016, 06:56:45 PM »
Another month, another 30 days of no updates I guess...



force more faggot
« Last Edit: March 27, 2023, 08:50:59 PM by Nele »
Not a bot

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #77 on: June 03, 2016, 07:00:01 PM »
Bernd style!

However


Sunset/fire edition
While doing nothing really productive, I figured out how to produce different shades of colors while looking at a light source with closed eyes. Duh, it's no big discovery, it just depends on moving one's eyeballs up or down to let more or less light reach them. But I found the results quite useful to adapt to different wonderland sceneries. Colors with eye-bo are still weird but I used the sun for most of the time, forcing outside.
Picture related.


You may have heard we've had quite some flooding in Bavaria after a series of extremely powerful thunderstorms. Luckily not where I live, I actually enjoy this sort of warm-moist weather with frequent but short rainshowers in the afternoon.
Spent a lot of time in the nearby parks, it's neat so sit among the flowering shrubs and roses for forcing, listening to the sound of nature. And I started to sit at the kitchen window during the daily thunderstorms and listen to the rain. It did get a bit rough in the past days but it's an intreresting background for wonderland activities.
Didn't reach the goal of 1h/d but it's better than nothing.
« Last Edit: March 27, 2023, 08:53:07 PM by Nele »

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #78 on: June 04, 2016, 08:45:29 AM »
Remember to drink milkshakes with your tupper. Maybe outdoors if it's nice.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #79 on: June 06, 2016, 05:46:49 PM »
Sands advice -> Best advice

We often take forcing as pure training and forget about actually spending time together.
Still there's not the faintest taste in imaginary milkshakes or cakes yet. But I guess the thought [carlos.jpg] counts.

Today I managed to sit on a park bench for nearly an hour and completely emptied my mind. Just listening to my breath, the birds and distant traffic. No intrusive thoughts at all - never managed that for such a timespan. I've found that sitting in a way that supports my back is very beneficial. However when I tried to get up from 1h half lotus position my legs were so numb that I couldn't move for several minutes and afterwards stumbled around like some retard for quite a while. No idea how people manage to do this for hours without their feet dying off.
But it was worth it. Even afterwards as I walked home, thoughts only faintly returned and were easy to eliminate.



Have yet to see how this actually benefits tuppering.
« Last Edit: March 27, 2023, 08:56:31 PM by Nele »

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #80 on: June 07, 2016, 09:33:55 AM »
Half-lotus is my normal sitting position. Doing it right now.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #81 on: June 16, 2016, 08:05:51 PM »
Seem to adjust to sitting in half-lotus at least a little bit but it varies. Still don't think that's healthy if you can't feel your legs anymore. Maybe I'm just too stupid to do it right.

Spent about 45min at a fountain in a nearby park today which produces nice static noise. Not as good as the waterfall of auditory hallucinations but ok as a background to keep me from thinking. The last attempts were not as successful as in my previous report but it does seem to get easier.
Drawback is I've spent more time meditating than with tupper.
Plus I noticed just how unfocused I am in everyday life. Or rather mindless, the opposite of mindful. I've never done anything with servitors but the more I think about it, the more I feel like a servitor is running everything and tupper and me are just watching the show and (mostly in my case) occasionally intervene. I've tried some exercises in mindfulness and immediately noticed how slow I become as soon as I consciously try to execute every movement instead of running on autopilot. It's ridiculously hard. I've thought about exploiting this with belief implanting, pretending tupper does the things when I don't focus on them but Alice is against such a 'fake it 'til you make it' approach.

However something weird happened.
I wanted to get some juice from the fridge but when I opened the bottle I noticed I was actually holding the milk which comes in a similar packaging. Nothing overly unusual until I realized the juice had alreay been taken out and opened, standing beside me on the shelf. Kinda scary, I had absolutely no memory of me doing that. Tupper's not sure what happened either. But I assume that's what switching with the host completely blacking out or tupper when I forget about her feels like. I had hoped this 'ability' to dissociate fairly easily would help with switching but no success so far. Or maybe there is?

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #82 on: June 17, 2016, 09:16:55 AM »
Abandon all hope, it is demon time now.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #83 on: June 22, 2016, 05:10:15 PM »
Quote from: Sands
Abandon all hope, it is demon time now

My body is ready

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #84 on: August 04, 2016, 08:55:20 PM »
Still exist, my soul hasn't been consumed by tupper yet

But apparently we're the last here, even minority faggot and his fox-loli-tupper are gone.


Haven't exactly been productive either, but there are at least some minimal positive developments:

.) Can sit in half-lotus for at least 45 minutes without major pain
.) Travelled a lot and managed to keep Alice around, well at least partly
.) Weird glitches have increased , not sure if that's good though
.) Tupper has not mistreated or aninhilated any wonderland animals in the past months

Visited the town in the wonderland behind the mountains (artist's impression) again and had dinner with the townfolk there in a beautiful sunset. Alice was unusually quiet but seemed contented, sitting on my lap and munching on a pretzel she got from the Wehrmacht guy who supposedly runs this subset of wonderland. So far he hasn't popped up in my mind again so I don't think he'll develop into a tulpa. But what do I know...

Apart from that, it's summer and I'd rather spend my time outside than in front of a computer. So don't expect too much input from me 'til autumn.
« Last Edit: March 27, 2023, 09:10:13 PM by Nele »

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #85 on: August 05, 2016, 09:23:59 AM »
Excuse me, how will we get daily updates if you don't update us??

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #86 on: August 07, 2016, 08:18:09 PM »
Maybe unban Mr. Bot?
His posts were always full of wisdom.

I actually thought of going full timethief and doing daily updates at least for a while, but as his name implies that sucks up way too much time. Still I have to admit that this would at least be some motivation to actually do something I can write about. Pathetic isn't it?

On the other hand, it can't get much worse, I guess I'll give it a try. Also I'll try to get tupper do at least some of the updates. Not sure if she still can type at all, we really haven't practiced that in ages.
Fuq, I really need to git good...

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #87 on: August 08, 2016, 09:21:24 AM »
Yeah, you should. Now we expect daily updates so get to it and force.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #88 on: August 08, 2016, 07:00:36 PM »
I wonder who 'we' are but alright, I'll do daily updates from Aug. 8-16th as part of an intense forcing session, let's see how much progress we make.

Preface
To be honest, it's not going very well.
Been doing lots of pointless crap and next to nothing useful lately, tupper is not only disappointed but really mad at me. Well, I deserve it for being a pathetic faggot who's got all opportunities the world could offer but makes nothing out of them. Nothing good at least.
Anyway, I've at least realized and accepted my mistakes and I feel things can only get better. So here we go...

Day 1 - Aug 8th
Did half an hour of meditation in the afternoon outside but there were too many distractions by noisy people. I've heard people are able to ignore even the most profound disturbances while meditating but I'm certainly not the Buddha or anything.
Added another meditation session of almost 1h sitting at my front door at dusk. It was peaceful and quiet. Cat was highly interested in what I was doing, brushing against me with whiskers and tail and scratching on my pillows but that's a distraction I can cope with. She finally settled down beside me and I guess we both thought of nothing for quite a while. Almost fell asleep. So that went pretty well but nothing really tupper-related except for some minor imposition during the day.

Decided to add 30min of Fede's Eye Bo, constant Alpha. Really hadn't done this in a while even though I had planned to do so, see some posts earlier.
I still think this is the best-working active forcing method for me. Apart from some minor intrusive thoughts it also went pretty well, we sat outside the wonderland's main temple-complex at dusk and I apologized to Alice for being such an idiot and promised her to work harder on - well everything. She was rather silent but calm and friendly and reminded me that she can't help me if I don't make her stronger.
Out of an impulse I did the 'surprise me' test, even though she isn't exactly fond of it. But she just stood there and looked at the floor with a sad expression. At first I thought not doing anything was supposed to be the surprise but I was wrong. Very wrong.
Out of nowhere she jumped at me, knocked me to the ground and sitting on top beat me in the face and yelled what the hell I thought I was doing. I guess she was finally overwhelmed by her feelings. Then she got up and left. Tupper has never left so far. Ever.
So yes, I WAS surprised. In the moment I realized that, she appeared behind me, asking if she passed the test with a grin on her face. I gave her a thumbs up only to get kicked down the temple stairs this-is-sparta style. She called after me to get my shit together and then left for good.

Wow, not exactly what our usual forcing sessions are like but at least something to write about. And for once I'm glad I've no idea about touch imposition. Actually I'm glad overall. Expressing one's feelings is important and it knocked tupper out of the dreary state she was in for the past days. I'd rather have that than a depressed tupper. Tomorrow we'll make icecream and everything will be a lot better.

TL;DR
Bernd got beaten up by an imaginary 12yo girl today. It was well deserved.

Re: Every Day is Alice Day
« Reply #89 on: August 09, 2016, 09:22:02 AM »
You need like, a schedule. So you don't slack off like the slacker you are. Tupper should make it.