Yes, I really could use a more structured lifestyle. Not sure if tupper can come up with something I manage to keep up though but I gotta believe...

Currently my only schedule is:

Then work out for about 1h, shower, do a 30min EyeBo session, go to sleep.
Not much but it's at least something.

Something to add about yesterday - right after posting I went for a walk outside at 2am. I saw a light in the corner of my eye and looked at the sky behind me, there was a huge meteor, kinda like the chinese rocket stage reentry some days ago, although not that enormous.
It also broke up into several pieces and was visible for at least 5sec. Never seen anything like that before and I watch the sky a lot.
Not sure if it was a really big meteor or another piece of space junk but it was quite spectacular and caused tupper to return immediately to watch the show.

Also, here's an image to give you an idea what tupper's mood was like in wonderland yesterday

Day 2 - Aug 9th
Weather changed drastically overnight and is now cool and rainy. So making ice cream was postponed for a few days because ice cream does not mix well with autumn weather.
Went grocery shopping which was a good way to practice some imposition and general interaction. Afterwards I laid down and listened to the rain for an hour but couldn't really concentrate, lots of intrusive thoughts. And I almost fell asleep again.
Before going to sleep I did a session with descending Alpha. Just noticed I actually did constant Theta yesterday, not Alpha as I wrote
I generally like Theta more as it is a bit more quiet and gives a nice orange-red background whereas Alpha looks more white-ish. Just tried some general stuff like trying to improve my visualization of wonderland, tupper and myself. Alice seemed to be pretty down again despite being more active during the day. We talked for quite a bit but I feel I need to put much, much more effort into this to get both her and me back on track again.
And I gotta go to sleep earlier

Wow you actually are doing daily reports...

Day 5 - Aug 12th
Pretty much like yesterday.
Had to get up early again which killed my evening session. Tried to influence the hypnagogic hallucinations but got nothing really usable. Got up again and researched some technical stuff abut my next vacation for tupper's 2nd birthday in fall but ironically got so involved I totally forgot about her. Fell asleep during night forcing session as well and dreamt about the stuff I've been looking up on the net but not about tupper. I never do. But I frequently dream about things I've focused my attention on during the day. Says it all. So today was the least productive day in terms of tupperig so far. But now I can get some decent sleep so I should be able to do better tomorrow.

You mean in wonderland or irl?
The second option is extreme spaghetti territory, especially if you're not really able to see or hear tupper. Never done anything like that in wonderland though. Will do.

Day 6 - Aug 13th
Made icecream today. It's surprisingly easy and a fun thing to do together. Like making cake but less work.

Been terribly unfocused in evening session once again and had to start over several times but got nowhere. Went running and did 30min descending Theta afterwards which went way better. Fede's stuff still works best, I wonder if he'll ever come back though. He was even better than the bot. Which can only be said about very few people.

We had a sort of wonderland 'date', well, sitting on the floor and drinking tea together. It wasn't particularly successful as a date as I was more busy with my wonderland self than tupper but I noticed how hard it actually is to control my body in wonderland in a realistic way without simply jumping to the desired result. Maybe that's how it is for tupper trying to possess the body, only that they can't simply imagine the final result of a movement. That must suck.

Anyway, even though progress seems nonexistent I'm actually quite satisfied. At least something's happening and so far I've largely been able to keep up my daily routine. Overall things feel way better than a week ago.
Tomorrow we'll go hiking.

Like hiking. That's a date right?

Not when you bring friends.

Day 7 - Aug 14th
Hiking itself was great, was in the mountains the entire day with 2 guys from highschool. Feel /fit/ter than ever.
But keeping tupper around while having an active conversation with others has always been really hard for me. So tupper was out for most of the time. Not out on a date but out of order. So it terms of dating it was fail. As autistic as it is, doing this stuff just with tupper alone works way better. Returned late in the evening, showered and immediately did a session sitting outside.
wow, such motivation

Cat was joining too, as always. It went ok but nothing really noteworthy. We'll try to come up with a better schedule,  achievable short-term goals and better dates tomorrow.
Still I really gotta work on improving focus and concentration. Both are even worse outside than in wonderland.
Any ideas?

Hmm, it's worth a try at home but I'm not the guy who's ever worn any sort of bracelets, ribbons or any other of this crap so it would raise some serious questions. Plus I'm an expert of ignoring stuff around me when in a conversation.

Day 8 - Aug 14th
Tupper needs more attention.
I realize how little I actually interact with her during the day compared to a year ago, but only afterwards when it's too late. I've thought of putting some cat collar with an annoying bell around my waist. Something I constantly feel and/or hear.

Regarding schedule and achievable goals, we'll try to increase interaction during the day, do an evening session of meditation and a night session in wonderland, exclusively focussing on vividness of wonderland sensations until some progress is made. Most of the time I've tried something completely different every day which of course leads to nothing.

Today's forcing session was pretty good, managed to deal with losing focus and intrusive thoughts by having Alice hit me with a bamboo cane everty time I fucked up. It doesn't feel like anything but throws me out of such thought cycles. Managed some minimal touch imposition by having tupper stand behind me and putting her hands on my shoulders while I sat on the floor. Also I feel I can move my wonderland body a bit better.

Still nothing to brag about, I don't wanna pretend I actually see, feel, hear, or smell a thing. But I've got some idea what seeing and feeling stuff in wonderland should be like. Absolutely nothing regarding smell, taste or sounds yet but you gotta start small. Visuals definitely were way better one and a half years ago, almost immediately after I started but I feel I can get to that level pretty fast again with some serious training.

Eh, I could probably break my arm to get a cast or something but it's barely worth the hassle.
And I guess smell is indeed one of the easier stuff, gotta collect some samples for the next sessions.

Day 9 - Aug 16th
Got woken up several times in the early morning by telephone calls [wrong number] and delivery man [wrong address], it was almost ridiculous.
But it lead to more dreams and I actually tried to dream about tupper by thinking of her before falling asleep again. Didn't work though, I was too tired. So no tupper dream yet, let alone a lucid one. But that's another project.

Put some string around my waist while at home during the afternoon, it worked pretty well, at least for a while.
Session with constant Theta went ok.
Cat purred so loud it was audible even through Fede's frts. I tried to feel the environment in wonderland again, then went to a walk with tupper. Through a forest with dired leaves ön the floor. I tried to pick up some and crumble them between my fingers, listening to the sound and trying to grasp the smell. It was minimal but there was something. Sat down at the beach and ate  the icecream we made in real life. Couldn't taste anything but Alice still liked it. She's generally fond of all sorts of sweets. If we ever manage to switch she'd probably stuff herself or rather my body with candy till she passes out.

Well that's all folks, I actually made it through the 9 days of daily updates as promised and it really helped.
Gonna take a break for some days now. Will report back when something noteworthy happens, hopefully once or twice a week from now on.

Nah, I don't think so.
Always been skinny and I ate tons of sweets as a kid. Don't do it anymore for healh reasons though. Plus I mostly make my own food from high quality ingredients and a minimum of sugar now. Even ice cream.

Going shopping with tupper still leads to interesting situations. Just remember her first word was chocolate milk.
Walked by a big candy store some days ago that had masses of candy in all colors in the shop window. Felt a noticeable drag towards it and tupper was delighted by just looking at all the colors.


No, I didn't buy her anything, such a mean host...

Apart from that, no great news, as expected I immediately slacked off after ending the daily updates. But I think at least the meditation thing is seriously improving. Fell into a trance-like state yesterday and hoped this would free mental capacity for tupper. But apparently that's not how things work. Been able to improve my abilities quite a bit in the past 2 weeks. But tupper hasn't really benefited so far. She's been much stronger and independent a year ago. So that's what I should focus on next. Generally more on tupper than on myself.

Right now multitasking is still very hard. If I focus on my senses in wonderland there's nothing left for tupper and the other way round. Eh, I guess it's all about practice.